Month: June 2016

Tans and Deceit

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Look at this young man’s dead eyes. If only to distract you from his unibrow.

Readers we haven’t talked about it before but this photo reminds me: Men attempt to deceive women by using spray tans. This is why women have trust issues. They believe their man is naturally tanned when in reality he’s nothing but a toasted marshmallow. This is why you take them swimming on the first date.

 

Pillows and the Devil

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Folks I am beginning to suspect that emoji pillows are in cahoots with the devil.

Men, we have talked about this. Pillows are NOT for that head.

I worry for today’s generation of men. They see and think it’s perfectly acceptable to do rub pillows on their private parts. How do you sleep at night? I bet not very well since you’ve worn out your pillows.

ABC’s of Immodesty

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A B C
It’s easy as, 1 2 3
As simple as, modesty
A B C, 1 2 3
Baby, you and me boy
A B C
It’s easy as, 1 2 3
As simple as, modesty
A B C, 1 2 3
Baby, you and me boy

Did you enjoy that? Well, you shouldn’t have. Now you’re one step closer to hell. Don’t look over you shoulder honey, because I’ll not be there.

Beliebe in Modesty

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Oh boy. Where to begin? The immodesty and tattoos are bad enough, but the housekeeping…

Young man, didn’t your father teach you to pick up after yourself? I guess not, because then he also should have told you to keep your testicular self exam to yourself.

Justin, I would like to ask you a favor (actually two), one please stop rapping, and two Beliebe in your talent and don’t depend on your body.

Criminal Immodesty

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Wearing sunglasses indoors to hide the shame in his eyes. 

Readers, this young man is Shemar Moore. He is an actor known for his role as an FBI agent on the TV show Criminal Minds.

Folks, I’m tired. We’ve spoken to several celebrities in past about their immodest behavior. Is all our work for nothing? Mr. Moore, I would hope that would have more respect for yourself. After all FBI agents are nothing if not paragons of virtue.

Also, I am starting to believe Calvin Klein got into the underwear business just to promote immodest among men.